Exile
by Darth Amidala
Summary: Padme Amidala has been in exile on Dagobah for twenty years. But one day, two twins come to her wanting to know some things... Alternate ending. Pre-episode six time.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 – Dagobah

There's a knocking on the door. I jump up in surprise for a moment, and then sink back into my chair. Tapping my foot in the code that Sabe and I have, I give her permission to enter my refuge. She enters, and I can tell by her face that something's wrong. I don't ask her, though. I don't say a thing.

"You have visitors Padme."

I'm surprised she can say this with such simplicity. It's not an everyday experience. In fact, this is my first visitor since my "funeral". So I am more than a little surprised. In fact, I'm so surprise I speak.

"Let them in." I say, with the mental decisive digestion of about two seconds.

Sabe doesn't object, but she looks uneasy as I stand up and walk to the living room".

There sits two people with their backs turned, conferring with each other. One, the boy with blonde hair, reminds me of-the thought breaks off-and the other bears a striking

resemblance to me.

"Hello" I say softly, not wanting to interrupt." I heard you wanted to talk to me."

"Yes," the boy says, standing up. "We thought you might have information of our parents."

_Right to the point, aren't we?_

The boy draws out a picture from his pocket. "This" he says, "is our father."

In his hand is a picture of Darth Vader.


	2. Chapter 2

AU: This part is a little sentimental...

Chapter 2

My heart hammers. Is it possible? I don't know whether or not to get my hopes up or not, because they do say what comes up must come down. I suppose their could be other twins that...

That what? That have Darth Vader as their father? I have not lost all of my rationality over the years. But there is one thing I have to know...

"What are your names?" I ask, dreading and hoping for the answer.

"Luke," he says, gesturing to himself, "and Leia."

My children. After twenty years, their alive. My children. And as I think this phrase over in my head, a hard part of me disappears.

"Who were they?" My voice sounds stronger.

"Well, this," Luke says, looking at his hologram, "is Darth Vader, as you probably already know..." He looks up at me. "You might have known him as Anakin Skywalker."

I mentally wince at the name, and I can tell Leia does too."Yes," I say, "I knew him.

Luke looks excited. "What about our mother?"

I laugh a little. "Yes, I knew her too. We are very close."

Leia gasps a little. "I take that to mean she's still alive?"

"Yes," I say cryptically, not divulging any more information.

"Where?"

I sigh and begin to pace. How to tell them? I pick up my japor pennant that I have never taken off and show it to them. "Your father gave this to me when I was fourteen and he was nine." I stop and look up. "He asked if I was an Angel. I told him he was a funny little boy, and he didn't know that I wasn't what he thought I was..." I realize their is no easy way to say this, and I need to tell them now. "I am your mother."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I look out of the window to the half formed death star, and feel like it's sitting there, mocking me. _Oh, look, I can destroy a planet! I can conquer galaxies! I can gain the emperors approval for disbanding the imperial senate and your leash is approximately three inches long! _ I just think it looks…wrong. No man, droid, humanoid or machine should be able to do this. These are not a Sith's thoughts, though. They are another man's thoughts, one who died a long time ago. So I push these thoughts aside, and leave my thoughts at what the emperor would want- ones of pride and hate and death. Yet I can tell this is a mental argument I will be revisiting…

My ruminations are interrupted by the beeping of my comlink. _What do they want now_? I think, just wanting to be left alone to my thoughts once.

_"Lord Vader, There is a ship approaching." _ Piett's voice rings out with a tinge of respect and fear. And again, my thoughts are invaded by an intruder- _I wish I could be called my name, just one more time…_ "What do they want?" I ask, trying to be the image that Piett holds so fearfully in his nightmares.

"_They claim to need to see you on a personal basis."_ Piett explains. _Personal?_ _That description doesn't apply to you anymore, remember? You don't have feelings, you don't love anyone, you killed your wife, you cut of your son's hand…_

"Give them clearance." I command, needing something other than missions and demands and prison checks that overflow my schedule. A tiny part of me, from my perspective, sees this as defiance for the emperor to see.

As I walk to the hangar bay, I wonder what made me go on such a whim. I didn't even ask who it was, or what the personal basis was. I know that my need of a break from reality did not cause me to break protocol. Maybe, it was the force, I wonder. No, I can't wonder about it. There is true and there is false. There is no maybe. These thoughts remind me of one of my old instructor's teachings…

I wait for the ship as it comes down. I can sense three life forms on board. But as the ramp comes down, only one emerges. As she walks up to me, I remember that I am a representative of the Empire, and I adjust my stance to look intimidating. Waiting to hear this person out, I stand there waiting. But this person's face is still covered with a hood and is making no move to remove it. Growing impatient, I use the force to both lift the hood and maybe scare a little meekness into this unusually brash person. Yet after I do this, I am beginning to wish I hadn't , because underneath that visor is a wanted criminal - Princess Leia Organa.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The silence is unbearable. As unpredictable as Vader is, I can't tell what he'll do. Arrest me? Kill me? Torture me again? Though I know he is my father, thanks to Yoda's reluctant last words, I still can't bear to call him that word because I know he does not qualify for that title. I still don't know how to tell him. Luckily, I have a backup plan that will clear up any doubt in his twisted mind…

Vader unfreezes from his rigid stance. Igniting the crimson lightsaber that he's so infamous so throughout the galaxy, He asks, "What are you doing here?" He's probably confused. Knowing me (slightly), He should know that I am not one to surrender. He's had a couple…experiences with this stubbornness.

"Luke has told me some … _interesting_ news about his lineage," I say coldly, beginning to pace. I can't help but think, why, oh _why _can't the moron just use that force thing and know I'm his daughter. It would save me a lot of trouble. "Yes, he told me." I say as I stop and look at him angrily. I can tell he wishes he'd just kept that information to himself. "I have also learned of my lineage. Apparently, I'm adopted." It feels uncomfortable sharing this private bit of important information with Vader. I'm still getting used to the idea of being adopted, so it feels uncomfortable saying this, period.

"And, why are you telling me this?" Vader asks. "I doubt you came all this way just to confide in me." He's using sarcasm. I hate it when people use sarcasm with me. So I decide to land a bit of a blow on Vader. _This is going to be "fun", _I think.

"Luke's my brother." I say indifferently, hoping to intimidate him just a little bit. That moment would have been much more relishing if he didn't have that darned mask. _Come on, just a little bit of surprise?_ WHY IS THIS PERSON'S REACTION TIMING SO SLOW?

Finally he speaks. "What," He says, "makes you think I'd treat you any better than I treated you brother? "

"I don't." I say simply. "But you'd treat our mother right." I mutter. I'm slightly scared at what the answer will be. And I look up and tell that I've hit a nerve.

"Yes, " He says kind of sadly, "I would." He looks up at me sharply, "But she's gone now." I smile.

"Are you really so sure about that?" I ask, knowing this is the fun part. Without waiting for an answer, I call up to the ship, "Luke, It's time," I say slightly melodramatically. And as he brings our mother down from the ship, I can sense Vader's surprise. Once she reaches the bottom of the ramp, she smiles and gives Vader a little wave. I can almost read her thought – _No time no see, Ani… _

Oh, yes. There's the reaction. I bet right now he's wishing he had ordered carpet for the hanger instead of hard, painful concrete.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the reviews! The person obsessing about carpet, right then that humor was much needed. Very funny. And I'm sorry but there won't be much Han Solo, as my sister hates him and threatened to rip up my Star Wars calendar if I so much as mentioned his name. I'm gonna risk it... Hopefully this will be a longer chapter.**

* * *

><p>"Leia, It's not that funny," I say angrily to my sister. "In fact, it's not funny at all."<p>

This does nothing to sate her hysterics. She hasn't stopped laughing since our father fainted into a heap at the hanger.

I think she's in shock.

"Oh but it is, it is!" She looks up, her face puffy and red. "Darth Vader, the hand of the Emperor, faints like a Corasaunti melodrama... Just because he finds out his wife is alive."  
>"You don't think you were part of that, too?" I ask. "You didn't even break it to him <em>nicely."<em>

"He didn't break it to _you_ nicely!" She yells, her humor forgotten. "He cut of your hand and then demanded you over to the dark side! He watched like an _idiot_ at what might have been your death."

"Stop yelling." I look over to the cot with tubes coming out of a sleeping body."You'll..."

"Wake me?" The figure on the cot asks tiredly.

Leia's face pales and she actually has the gall to look...nervous.

"You already did that five minutes ago."

Our father says nothing more as he attempts to turn over. I hope he doesn't try to destroy the tubes out of frustration. Better yet, I hope he doesn't destroy _me._

We walk over cautiously. Trying not to arouse suspicion, I send a quick mental telegraph to our mother.

_He's awake_

I can sense her confusion, then excitement. I hope she doesn't give herself an ulcer on the way here.

I'm also very excited. I can't wait to finally meet my father for real. Still, he's not opening his eyes.

"Wake up." I say gently. I can hear Mother thudding through the hall way, a slip and a "What the...", and she's in the doorway.

Still he won't respond. I motion for her to be quiet, and I gently revive him from his murky state into consciousness.

He finally opens his eyes and they're a startlingly shade of blue. Leia sends me a message.

_I thought they were supposed to be yellow_

_They are_

Leia's confused, so am I.

"Hi." Our father says after an eternity a yawn. I keep waiting for him to notice his appearance, for him to scream, "I have hair!".

But he doesn't, he doesn't even notice his skin is like a baby's.

"Hello." He says again, looking like he's expecting something.

Something tickles the back of my mind, the tickle forming a thought, the thought forming dread. But not really.

"What's you name?"

He laughs, like that's obvious. "Anakin Skywalker."

**I know, I'm evil. Hello? Darth _Amidala_? But I will update again when I get home. I'm on a roll!**


	6. Chapter 6

The surprise seems to reel everybody. Everyone but me, or maybe I'm so surprised my training has kicked in - and I transfer to senator mode. I move swiftly to ( Vader, Father, Anakin?) him and sit down next to him. "What's the last thing you remember?" I ask him with more gentleness than intended.

He thinks for a moment. "Well, I was on my speeder to Coruscant, because we were going to protect..." He breaks off for a moment, looking at my mother briefly. "Her."

We can all tell he doesn't want to reveal more information. So Luke and I probe his mind a little ( this thing is really getting useful!) and find out that the man that was going to die was the Emperor - and he could save our mother. I can't find anything more.

He glares at us. "Stop getting in my mind!" he says, frustrated. I roll my eyes. " I know you're force users,"

Our mother bursts into laughter. "Ani," She says between giggles,"They're just trying to help you."

He looks at her for a moment. " I haven't seen you for ten years, and you still call me Ani." He says in wonderment.

I feel like banging my head against something. "How old are you?" I ask. Mom stops laughing.

"Nineteen."

A collective moan rises up in the family. "Do you want an explanation for the twenty- three years you've missed?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yes." He says, still looking so, so confused.

"Well," Mom says, " You'll be glad to know that we get married."

He waves his hand dismissively. " I already knew we would."

"So, let me get this straight," I cut in. " You remember getting married."

"No."

"You're a nineteen year old with twenty year old children," Luke muses thoughtfully, his first words for a while.

"What?" He asks, freaking out.

"Yeah," I say. "We're your twin kids." This is so much more easier than last time I told him I was his child.

"You know what?" He says. " I'm gonna go back to sleep." And with that, he rolls over.

Mom begins holding up fingers, counting. Three, two, one, and he begins to snore loudly.

* * *

><p>"I don't mind that much," Mom says absently after we are kicked out kindly but firmly by the staff.<p>

" What do you mean, you don't mind?" Luke mumbles through his cafeteria-bought sandwich (which he is inhaling at an inhumanly rate).

"Don't you think it's better like this?" She asks. " Better as a Jedi Padawan than a Sith lord?"

" Well..." He says hesitantly. " Yes. But aren't you worried about when he remembers everything?"

"No," She says, smiling. Then she turns to me. " Leia, I know that you're upset about what he's done to you. But keep in mind that he hasn't done any of those things yet in his mind. Please don't hold that against him right now."

"I know!" I say. "I'm treating him fine, and I am calm. I've accepted the fact he is my father, and that I can't change that. So I might as well love him as well as I can." I hope I've spoken the truth. " How are you forgiving him?" I turn the tables.

"When you love somebody, you tell them that. And if you've spoken the truth, than you do. You don't say, ' I love you as long as' or 'I love you if'. You just love them as much as you can, with no strings attached and let life go on. I though differently not more than a month ago, because I thought love had failed Anakin and I, but as you see..." She held out her hands in a placid gesture. "Everything will turn out all right."

We stare at her, dumbfounded. Luke wants to clap, I can tell.

"That was the best love speech," Luke says, "_ever._"

Mom smiles again. Wow, today might be the happiest day ever for her.

Finally, we are allowed to go back up and see our father. When we enter, he's in fetal position.

"Ani?" Mom shakes him. " I thought they said he was awake," she says to us over her shoulder.

"I am, go away." His muffled voice says.

"No. Tell me." Her voice is firm, and I can tell where I got my Senator Voice.

He peeks out of the hospital sheets. His face is streaked with tears. "Obi- Wan- our his ghost-came and told me everything." He chokes out.

Mom's face turns angry, and it just makes him cry more. "HE TOLD YOU?" She explodes. He nods miserably.

"Padme, I'm so sorry." He says "No, I'm sorry for everything." He looks at us. "Both of you. I've wronged you all so, so much."

"I'm not mad at you," She says. " I'm mad at him." She storms out.

"Oh, gosh." He sat up and buried his face in his hands. "I want to die."

"Which part?" I ask instead of comforting him as I intended.

"All of it."

I nod. "I forgive you," I say suddenly surprising him and myself.

"But I can't forgive myself..."

And in that moment Luke and I realize that our father is filled with light, and he's truly our father again.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Luke and Leia are still standing silently at my bedside as I cry like a nine-year-old. I haven't wept like this since my mother died ( but only in private). Oh, wait. Maybe I have. I wouldn't know, since apparently I missed the LAST TWENTY-THREE YEARS!

And, maybe that wouldn't be so bad. But the havoc I had wrecked upon my home, my _life,_- I better had shed a tear! But all the horrors Obi-Wan had told me that Darth Vader had done was nothing compared with the horrors I hear through Luke and Leia's memories (I knew Obi-Wan wouldn't tell me everything, it's in his nature). I can hear them, see them, feel them. I'm living them. Well, the ones associated with Darth Vader. None of them are good.

I sit up and stare at them, locking my eyes with theirs. "No-" Luke says as he comprehends what I'm learning." You don't want to see them." I nod. Yes, I do. I must.

After gleaning all the information I can form my son I swallow down my disgust for myself and try to turn them into cold facts, not terrors. It's not working. I turn to Leia and prepare to do the same with her except she shivers and clasps her hands to her shoulders." Please don't, you'll only hurt me more." She begs.

I'm confused. "How could it possibly hurt you?"

Leia meets my gaze unsteadily. " It hurts me. You've-"She looks away. "You've already done this. Interrogated me, I mean."

"What?" I'm surprised, unpleasantly so. Seriously. I'm such a bad person.

"Yeah. You tortured me. I don't want to talk about it."

I slump. I'm going to have issues forever.

"So... what else did I do?" I ask, trying not to sound revolted.

"Everything." They say simultaneously. I hate myself.

"So. Is there anyone who likes me?" I ask. No emotion. Still.

"Mom does," Leia pipes up.

I try to hide a smile, but it doesn't work. That makes me feel better. I love that. How can I not remember it, though?

Speaking of Padme, she comes in. Her face is devoid of emotion. Not even I can tell how many are swirling through her right now.

"Do you know someone named Han Solo?" She asks our children- that's a strange thought. They nod. "Okay. He was just caught in the control room trying to send poison into the tube leading to Anakin's bloodstream."

Leia pales. "No. He wouldn't do that. It's a mistake."

"No. It's not. He admitted he did it because of the strong hatred he feels for Darth Vader." She looks at me, and I see a little love and concern in her eyes. "Let's leave him to sleep again. He needs it." So they leave, all stiff.

The second they are our the door, Obi-Wan's transparent ghost appears again. "Well," he says softly. "Now that I've ruined your day, I'll leave some warm memory."

I shake my head. "I want to talk to you about something. Something you don't know I know."

Padme and I are in the middle of an idyllic hilly meadow, its lush grasses sprinkled with flowers. At a distance, a herd of shaaks graze contentedly. Beyond is the shimmering expanse of the lake. Several other lakes stretch to the horizon. The warm air is full of little floating puffballs. We sit on the grass, talking. Padme is picking flowers.

"I don't know... " she says shyly.

" Sure you do..." I say. "You just don't want to tell me."

"Are you going to use one of your Jedi mind tricks on me?"

"They only work on the weak-minded. You are anything but weak-minded." I smirk.

" All right... his name was Palo. I was twelve. We were both in the Legislative Youth Program. He was a few years older then I... " her eyes narrow."Very cute... dark curly hair... dreamy eyes." I know she's teasing, but I still don't like it.

" All right, I get the picture... whatever happened to him?"

"I went on to become a Queen. He went on to become an artist. "

"Maybe he was the smart one."

"You really don't like politicians, do you? " she says, getting a little angry.

"I like two or three, but I'm not really sure about one of them". I smile. "I don't think the system works"

"How would you have it work?" She sounds like and adult entertaining a child.

"We need a system where the politicians sit down and discuss the problems, agree what's in the best interests of all the people, and then do it." It sounds simple enough to me.

"That is exactly what we do. The trouble is that people don't always agree. In fact, they hardly ever do." she says.

"Then they should be made to," I say like it's obvious.

By whom? Who's going to make them?"

"I don't know. Someone".

"You?" She sounds disbelieving.

"Of course not me. Someone wise. "

" That sounds an awful lot like a dictatorship to me." she says dismissively.

A mischievous little grin creeps across my face. " Well, if it works..." Padme stares at me. I look back at her, straight-faced, and can't hold a smile.

" You're making fun of me."

"Oh no, I'd be much too frightened to tease a Senator. " I say sarcastically.

" You're so bad!" Padme picks up a piece of fruit and throws it at me. I catch it. Padme throws two more pieces of fruit, and I catch those, too.

"You're always so serious. Always carrying the weight of the universe on your shoulders." I then start to juggle the fruit. Padme laughs and throws more fruit at him. I manage to juggle them until there are too many, and I lose control and duck, letting food fall on my head. We both laugh. I stand in front of a shaak, yelling at it and waving my arms. Padme starts laughing as I run in circles, chased by the beast. The shaak crosses in front of Padme. I am riding it, facing the shaak's tail. The shaak bucks, and I fall off.

Padme laughs even harder. I lie still. Padme jumps up and runs to where I am face down in the grass. She turns me over. I am pulling a stupid face at her. She yelps in mock fury and takes a swing at me. He catches her arm. She struggles. We roll over in the grass. Suddenly, we become aware of the contact between us. We let go of each other quickly and sit up, looking away.I stand up and hold out my hand to her. She takes it. And now we are easy together, not self-conscious any more.

It's a good thing I'm a lucid dreamer. I can feel, through the layers of sleep, a smile forming on my face. It's going to stay there for a while.

But I don't want it to be over...

"...you all right? You're trembling. What's going on?" An older Padme and I are talking softly in the familiar Coruscant lights.

" I'm just excited to see you." she lies easily. But I'm not fooled.

" That's not it. I sense more . . . what is it?"

Padme shakes her head. " Nothing . . . nothing . . ."

" You're frightened. Tell me what's going on!" I'm getting a little angry now.

Padme begins to cry. "You've been gone five months . . . it's been very hard for me. I've never felt so alone. There's . . ."

" . . . Is there someone else?" My tone is dead.

Her expression turns annoyed. " No! Why do you always think that? Your jealousy upsets me so much, Anakin. I do nothing to betray you, yet you still don't trust me. Nothing has changed." She sighs.

" I'm afraid of losing you, Padme . ..that's all." I say sheepishly.

" I will never stop loving you, Anakin. My only fear is losing you."

" It's just that I've never seen you like this . . ."

Padme shakes her head." Something wonderful has happened."

We look at each other for a long moment.

Padme continues. " I'm . . . Annie, I'm pregnant."

I am stunned. I think through all of the ramifications of this. I take her in my arms.

"That's . . . that's wonderful." I say finally.

" What are we going to do?" She's crying again.

" We're not going to worry about anything right now, all right? This is a happy moment. The happiest moment of my life."

I'm sure it was.


End file.
